If you record the lows then as you reach the highs you can recognize where you have been and how much you have accomplished. I bet somewhere there is an inspiring quote that says that much more eloquently. Alas I am feeling a bit too much in the pit to go search it out.
So here I am. At a low point.
I have heard that three is a tough age and I will enthusiastically add my vote to that tally. It seems in our case we are going to leave the threes with a crescendo of defiance. The word “no” has become a red flag propelling Dori toward the undesired behavior like a locomotive on fire. She is working with diligence and dedication to master the fine art of demanding dialogue. She practices her skills on mom, grandparents, cousins, friends and any other lowly subject she deems worthy enough to complete her bidding NOW! Tantrums come in the form of copious weeping pouts in which we watch our pitiful behavior in the nearest reflection, checking for proper form and sense of despair I am sure.
Part of this is my fault (isn’t it always) Dori is bored. She spends most of her day with grandparents and needs to get back into preschool. She is such a people person and living with all adults is not cutting it. We are just not that into playing house anymore (after discovering the nightmare of reality who can blame us). I just have not taken the time to get her settled back into a school. I am also reluctant to part with the last remains of my disposable income. Is there a support group for those going through withdrawal from the purchase of children’s clothing? I may need some help at the end of the month.
I do fear that school may not be the magic bullet it once was. Dori has started to exhibit some less than precious behaviors with other children. Saturday she got into a cat fight at ballet. She flicked a girl’s face for taking a pillow from her. The little girl then smacked Dori in the chest with her hand with an impressive amount of temper and force – seriously that smack could be heard across the studio – SMACK! (It is a poor parenting moment when you find joy in knowing the other kid’s parents are in so much more trouble than you. That is what I have been reduced to, delight at the bad behavior of other children.) It is a tribute to the resilience of kids that these two were fast friends a minute later (resilience and a high level of pain tolerance).
This is normal. This is a phase. This will pass. It is my mantra and I repeat it on the forty minute drive home from work planning strategy to make it a better night. Maybe I will try reading more books or doing a craft tonight. Maybe a swim. Or maybe, just maybe, Dori will be having a great day and I will not be reduced to screaming at the top of my lungs raising my voice a couple of hundred times tonight to get us through the daily routine of dinner and bed. I can hope.